Monday 25 January 2010

Hail readers of the Naked in Knightsbridge blog. So sorry I have been absent post-wise for the last month or so. Okay, I should have been busy writing, but the truth is I am actually quite lazy and adapt at procrastination, so over Christmas I committed to working but ended up doing nothing but socialising and eating. Now, despite the fact that I am still enjoying my daily cake fix a month later, I have now begun to work on my next book ‘Marrying out of Money’. Due to be released later this year, it is about a girl who is a little less pathetic than Jools in Naked, although I have ensured plenty of dubious character traits in other characters to keep my readers happy.

Anyway, sitting around all day eating cakes and writing is not exactly beneficial to my waistline. Whilst out shopping in my local supermarket some young guy approached me, advertising a nearby gym. He might as well have been advertising an eternity in hell with Satan and normally I try to avoid all eye contact with perky gym membership peddlers but I fell over one of my M&S foodhall bags and he was upon me.

“Do you exercise?”
“No,” I said, carefully replacing the six pack of cookies and jam and cream scones that had rolled from my stash.
“Well, maybe you should, after all, you’re a little on the tubby side, aren’t you?”
Jeez, did he expect me to agree with him? ‘Yes, I am huge, lead me to your gym.’
Instead I told him to hightail it to Satan’s parlour and leave me in peace.
“You know, pretty soon you’ll have to buy an extra seat on the plane. You don’t want that, do you?”

I was going to hit him with my M&S bags but they might have burst and that would be a waste of perfectly good food.

So, you see, we all have those days where Jool’s exploits seem so lifelike. Enough proscratination. Time to get back to working on my book.

Take care

Nicky xxx

1 comment:

  1. WTF? Damnit you so should have hit him! Or leapt on him, cream cake in hand, and shoved the whole thing into his mouth, forcing him to swallow the whole thing.

    Still, a waste of cake, but a worthy one.

    One has to admire the OTT marketing technique. Like the charity guys with clipboards who try and faux-compliment you and then make out that the world is going to end and that all the third-world kids are starving because YOU aren't donating. 'Do you want that to happen? How can you sleep at night?'

    I'm surprised Gym Moron didn't already have two black eyes. >.<

    (PS Can't wait for your next book!)

    ReplyDelete

Monday 25 January 2010

Hail readers of the Naked in Knightsbridge blog. So sorry I have been absent post-wise for the last month or so. Okay, I should have been busy writing, but the truth is I am actually quite lazy and adapt at procrastination, so over Christmas I committed to working but ended up doing nothing but socialising and eating. Now, despite the fact that I am still enjoying my daily cake fix a month later, I have now begun to work on my next book ‘Marrying out of Money’. Due to be released later this year, it is about a girl who is a little less pathetic than Jools in Naked, although I have ensured plenty of dubious character traits in other characters to keep my readers happy.

Anyway, sitting around all day eating cakes and writing is not exactly beneficial to my waistline. Whilst out shopping in my local supermarket some young guy approached me, advertising a nearby gym. He might as well have been advertising an eternity in hell with Satan and normally I try to avoid all eye contact with perky gym membership peddlers but I fell over one of my M&S foodhall bags and he was upon me.

“Do you exercise?”
“No,” I said, carefully replacing the six pack of cookies and jam and cream scones that had rolled from my stash.
“Well, maybe you should, after all, you’re a little on the tubby side, aren’t you?”
Jeez, did he expect me to agree with him? ‘Yes, I am huge, lead me to your gym.’
Instead I told him to hightail it to Satan’s parlour and leave me in peace.
“You know, pretty soon you’ll have to buy an extra seat on the plane. You don’t want that, do you?”

I was going to hit him with my M&S bags but they might have burst and that would be a waste of perfectly good food.

So, you see, we all have those days where Jool’s exploits seem so lifelike. Enough proscratination. Time to get back to working on my book.

Take care

Nicky xxx

1 comment:

  1. WTF? Damnit you so should have hit him! Or leapt on him, cream cake in hand, and shoved the whole thing into his mouth, forcing him to swallow the whole thing.

    Still, a waste of cake, but a worthy one.

    One has to admire the OTT marketing technique. Like the charity guys with clipboards who try and faux-compliment you and then make out that the world is going to end and that all the third-world kids are starving because YOU aren't donating. 'Do you want that to happen? How can you sleep at night?'

    I'm surprised Gym Moron didn't already have two black eyes. >.<

    (PS Can't wait for your next book!)

    ReplyDelete